


Thoughts Like Static

by EclecticSorcerer



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-28 12:04:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13903644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EclecticSorcerer/pseuds/EclecticSorcerer
Summary: Lucretia ponders the bitter irony of everything after the tragedy at Phandalin.





	Thoughts Like Static

Lucretia almost spat out her tea when Killian described the three men who had reclaimed the Gauntlet. A large man with striking sideburns, a dwarf who was far too casual in life and death situations, and an elf with horribly gaudy fashion taste. There were only three people she knew who would end up anywhere near each other and fit that description. Still, she swallowed her tea and kept her composure.

"Very well. They may be inoculated. They could be helpful to us."

* * *

Though she had been adequately warned of their presence, Lucretia struggled to remain still when her old friends walked into the room. Magnus, still looked so young. Merle was as cheerful as ever. Taako looked more haunted than when Lucretia last saw him, but his face was still the same one she remembered. Deep breaths.

"Welcome, the three of you," she said, forcing a calm smile on her face, "to the Bureau of Balance. It’s a pleasure to have you. I’ve heard a lot of great things about your performance from Killian. Before we go any further I’m going to need you to hand over the gauntlet so we can destroy it promptly."

Good. No room for questions. More time to form a plan.

"But it's  _our_ gauntlet."

It took all of Lucretia's willpower to keep from flinching at Magnus' words. He had no idea how much it really was theirs. Still, they couldn't be allowed to know. She quickly got to work, assuring the boys they would be paid, the Gauntlet was to be destroyed, everything would be fine. Whether or not the last part was for the boys' sake, or for her's, she didn't know. After the Gauntlet was destroyed, and the initiation trial completed, Lucretia sent the boys off and let out a deep sigh. How did everything go so wrong? And when had she gotten so much older? If she could go back to before, back to that long long century, she would. Was it ideal? No. But at least she had her friends. She was all alone now.

Davenport stood at her side, studying her as she watched the door, long after everyone else in the room had exited. "More to apologize for, Captain..." she said softly. She knew Davenport never understood anything she told him. How could it make any sense? No context or train of thought in her ramblings, just senseless babble and tears he would never really know the reason for.

It ached, she realized. She didn't dare face Davenport in the aftermath of things. It took her over a year to muster the courage, and now Taako, Magnus, and Merle were back, without an hour of warning. Her heart ached, and her blood was cold. She had stolen so much from them, over a century of memories. Taako, reduced to thinking he was a fool when all he was really missing was what mattered most to him. Magnus, who she could tell had gone through unimaginable pain since she last saw him, but was still a beacon of optimism. Merle... Merle hadn't really changed. He couldn't remember, it was impossible, but Lucretia knew the wise twinkle in his eye meant he knew more than he let on. He may not understand, but he definitely had more recognition than the others. Offhand meaningless comments, but too coincidental. Whether he understood or not, Merle had knowledge of the impossible. It suited him, Lucretia thought. A wise old cleric, with an infinite amount of tricks up his sleeve. She sighed again.

"Come on Davenport. We have work to do."

* * *

As time passed, Lucretia found the boys' presence easier and easier to bear. They still bore a constant reminder of her mistakes, but she had forgotten how hard they could make her laugh. She had forgotten how much she truly loved them. Their presence was a welcome distraction from everything else. But of course, Madam Director has to keep her composure. It hurt, keeping her distance, but she could deal with that. The months passed uneventfully, excepting the influx of relics being found and reclaimed. Until one day, when Taako was training Angus in the cafeteria. The Director happened to be walking by when she saw a flash, a panicked Taako wrestling a flaming umbrella to point at the wall, instead of a dejected looking Angus holding the burned remains of the macarons he had made earlier. When the light faded, three letters were etched into the wall that made Lucretia's heart stop.

Lucretia rushed to her office and slammed the door closed, locking it behind her. "God  _damn_ _it!_ " She hit the wall, biting her lip as she tried not to let the tears fall. She heard Davenport knock at the door, but ignored him. Lup was in the umbrella. There was no way to get her back. The umbrella  _ate_ magic. Which also meant somewhere along the way, Lup had died. Lucretia hurled a glass paperweight at the wall, falling to her knees on the floor. It shattered, and shards of glass went flying. Lucretia didn't even flinch when one grazed her cheek. But as she sat, a thought occurred to her. If Lup was in the umbrella, and able to send signs of it... she must be alive! As alive as a lich could be anyway. Lucretia rose to her feet. They almost had all the relics. He plan was almost complete. And after all was said and done, she could return her friends' memories. They could rescue Lup.

A fire ignited in Lucretia's chest, a fire she hadn't felt in a long time. She could do this. Her plan  _would_ work. She could stop wishing for a broken past. For the first time in a long time, Lucretia felt real hope, and it brightened her like never before. Soon, there would no longer be static.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I know if Lucretia knew about Lup she would say something when Taako got his memories BUT consider he was about to kill her, she asked for time to explain instead of trying to on the fly, and how did she not find out about the scorched wall before that whole issue anyway? She knew the umbrella was Lup's, and no one else remembered Lup existed so. Lucretia's smart. She gets it.


End file.
